.~Its Not Just Something~.

MOTIVATIONMY.COM: GOOD NEWS: The Art of Giving - Paying For Everyone...

2012-01-31T16:36:00.001+11:00

MOTIVATIONMY.COM: GOOD NEWS: The Art of Giving - Paying For Everyone...: Imagine walking into a coffee shop only to be told by the barista that you don't have to pay a single cent for your drink because the customer...

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2011-11-19T20:26:00.001+11:00

I'm Sorry

2011-09-28T17:43:00.000+10:00

I've got a terrible memory.
PLEASE
Don't give up on me.

Appearing on motivationMY.com

2011-09-18T17:33:00.000+10:00

A promise after 4 months!

I promised Syaf to answer the 5 questions for the motivationMY blog

but i finally answered them all *after being put in a difficult situation of course!*

Syaf,

Im sorry that i took so long.

Like i told you the questions are so challenging!

Thanks for putting it up!

oh! here's the link Feeza Ashruff 5 Questions.

cheers!

Down The Memory Lane.

2011-09-16T18:28:00.000+10:00

P/s: Thanks 'Aina (>.<)

tukang korek: Nabil

2011-09-14T03:47:00.000+10:00

tukang korek: Hidung: "All you need is to lie" said Pinocchio to Voldemort~

iCrap

2011-08-19T20:24:00.000+10:00

Call me nuts.

At times i stare at the wardrobe hoping ill find Narnia when i open them.

Truth be told:

Never once have i ever sat down and watch Narnia for more than 5 minutes

in my entire breathing life.

Unggun Bersih - A. Samad Said

2011-06-28T00:07:00.000+10:00

Unggun Bersih by A Samad Said

The (Im) Possible Rain

2011-06-22T05:02:00.000+10:00

Friday rain ruins my brain,

After a sleepless night,

Ive got the day to fight.

For one thing that i know is right,

Its impossible to achieve great heights.

Perhaps it's just hard,

Should i just hope for a wild card?

I have to push myself and try,

Just try so i can fly.

Trying to fly to be someone,

But then, not just anyone.

By:

Feeza A.Hassan

3.21pm

13/05/2011

Clayton Library

Source: Google

Tiada yang tahu.

2011-06-22T04:50:00.002+10:00

Andai paras rupa jadi ukuran,

Andai taraf hidup jadi saringan,

Andai cerdik pandai jadi nilaian,

Andai sudut pandang jadi taruhan.

Apa gunanya keunikan,

Apa gunanya kelainan,

Apa gunanya kepelbagaian,

Apa gunanya variasi.

Jika semuanya disisihkan,

Jika semuanya diakhirkan,

Jika semuanya dimatikan,

Jika semuanya dihindarkan.

Hilangkah seri dunia,

Hilangkah warna alam,

Hilangkah segala bicara,

Hilangkah segala tingkah.

Mungkinkah itu yang sebaiknya,

Mungkinkah itu yang dinantikan,

Mungkinkah itu yang jadikan,

Mungkinkah itu yang tertulis.

Akankah ada penyesalan,

Akankah ada amarah,

Akankah ada tangisan,

Akankah ada dendam.

Ataukah akan hadirnya kepuasan,

Ataukah akan hadirnya ketawa,

Ataukah akan hadirnya kegembiraan,

Ataukah akan hadirnya keyakinan.

Tiada yang tahu.

Hatta insan yang masih bernafas.

By:
Feeza A. Hassan
4.50am
22/06/2011
Home

Source: Google

Happy Father's Day

2011-06-19T01:04:00.002+10:00

Dear Papa,

Happy Father's Day Pa..

The greatest gift I ever had
Came from God; I call him Dad!
~Author Unknown

I love my father as the stars - he's a bright shining example and a happy twinkling in my heart.
~Adabella Radici

My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me.
~Auhor Unknown

What Is A Dad?

A dad is someone who
wants to catch you before you fall
but instead picks you up,
brushes you off,
and lets you try again.

A dad is someone who
wants to keep you from making mistakes
but instead lets you find your own way,
even though his heart breaks in silence
when you get hurt.

A dad is someone who
holds you when you cry,
scolds you when you break the rules,
shines with pride when you succeed,
and has faith in you even when you fail...

I Love You. <3

My first ever.!

2011-06-18T01:24:00.001+10:00

So, May 5th 2011 - that was the day i finally got to see Maroon 5 LIVE.

Never ever will i forget that day my entire life *so drama*

went with Aina - my ever so best housemate

and also..

Kavita - my tudung-less look alike crazy twin.

Ive got to admit that the night could never have gotten any better.!

That's Kavita - too happy..!

Before the show started.

With Aina.! - Thank you.! ur the best!

Seee..!! the tix!

The standing part to kinja-kinja as the show went on.

The Three of us.! :)

Adam Levine.!

Can i get a time machine please.?


Here's where it was held.!

Disclaimer: Photos are from Aina's camera.! :)

a gift to a dear sister and her husband.

2011-06-17T20:20:00.000+10:00

Easter Jimba

2011-05-07T03:47:00.003+10:00

What is Easter - simple. its the day bunnies lay eggs. (Im not kidding) *seriously i am.*
since when bunny lay eggs la.? there's a story behind it. Go Google.
im telling ya.. the day bunny lay eggs i would love to see prawns giving birth.

What is Jimba - i have no idea but it prolly means enjoy/enjoying/enjoyment.

So anything also can la ha..
Seriously, its been the week we have been waiting for,
Since we have been slaving through and through with uni work..
The day finally came.! And we successfully activated the jimba mode
and we went on with the program we prepared for the Easter week.
Yes, the program.. ya i know. we made a list of things we wanna do
so we wont just simply waste the holiday by terbangak-bangak-ing
trying to go on some last minute plans..

23rd April 2011 - City (Book Market) - Brunswick (McD) - ACMI
24th April 2011 - ACMI - Giant Maze - Victoria's Market
26th April 2011 - Chadstone - Movie - Nandos - Massage

I remember saying that its a week's break..
but kindly take note that due to our scholarly nature.
we spent the remaining days at home working on our assignments and also
jimba-ing with the laptop..

im so lazy to put many words so ill post a couple of pics on the places as mentioned above;

The Book Market - In Federation Square

The Giant Maze - Looks Awesome!

Big Ass Wheel - confused kid looking confused.

Yarra River - Yarra River Cruise


Nice view eh? - slightly below a couple who coudnt find a room. ahahaha yes u cant see it.

Yarra River - I kononnya tot this looks like a super photog material.

NO Burgers! why? - cos i ate it. p/s: its the Halal Mc Donalds.! Hence, i had A Big Mac!

Chocolate mud muffin - from Mc Donald.

Some retard doing silly things - ACMI Scree Exhibition.

The books i bought from the book market - i dont read as how i use to anymore :(

The Chocolate Mud Muffin - H.E.A.V.E.N

Here is what is in the Maze- freaky but funny stuffs.

Believe it or not - A Mobile teapot, in the Maze

Hoyts Chadstone Cinema

The day i met the Blue eyed dude. - Bradley Cooper

Lunch at Nandos - What i had

What my buddy had.

"adopted - poor little kitty that deserves being in a pot for being so cute. im sure they taste like chicken"

damn notty - if they were mine i would have shot them.

okay done, no picture from Victoria Market because we were too busy shopping that we only took mental pictures. Sorry.! and also there is no picture on the massage place. Seriously would you even allow anyone to take a picture of you while you are in a middle of a massage - doing the "damn it hurts but im not gonna scream face?" i guess not.

nak makanan malaysia!

2011-04-22T03:06:00.000+10:00

Okay as the tittle goes.. haha bukan saying dah skrng.. tittle pulak yg goes.~
after 2 months being in Melbourne.. makanan has been like the biggest issue.
bukan la issue sangat pun.. but more like the cravings..

So.. Aina (my housemate) ajak gi Federation Square dekat City
for a Talk organized by Melbourne Conversations.
Talk yg interesting.. dapat jugak la belajar benda baru yang di luar bidang kuasa harian kan?
balik-balik dok perang la elections la humanitarian aid la..
sekali sekali nak gak bernafas dengan udara baru.

At the end of the talk we all gi la Secret Recipe..~
Yelah bongok aku tau..
gi jauh sampai ke Melbourne tapi gi makan Secret Recipe..
Tapi serious laaa.. dah sangat lama tak dapat makanan biasa-biasa makan tu.!

So we had.. Seafood Curry Laksa yang sedapnyer teramatlah sedap!!!
nak nangis + nak pengsan pun ada okay..~
melampau lah kan..?
walaupun service dia lembab mcm kat malaysia gak..,
namun sebab makanan dia sedap..kesilapan itu di pardon-kan..

okay aku dah malas nak sambung sebab bau Maggie Ayam yg Aina masak is killing meh!

Bye nak makan.!

Tried Something New Today

2011-03-30T18:44:00.000+11:00

....And i Loved It.~!

Cupcake decorating organized by:

Monash University Caulfield, Australia

That is yours truly.. Done with decorating the first cupcake.

Blueberry-ish flavour.~

here's the 3 cakes i decorated with no particular theme..~

Esok Terbit Mentari.

2011-03-27T01:37:00.000+11:00

Deras angin dingin yang menyapa,
Kaku membeku lidah tuk berkata,
Takkan otak dapat meligat,
Kalau yang jauh asyik di ingat.

Andai terus terkenang apa yang dikenang,
Rasa yang resah pasti takkan tenang,
Akal dan hati terus menghanyut jauh,
Andai kecekalan belum bersauh.

Walau sekuat mana kaki mengorak tari,
Takkan berganjak andai hati tak mahu memberi,
Walaupun payah ku tetap mahu berlari,
Aku berdoa agar lebih kuat pabila esok terbit mentari.

Feeza A. Hassan
1:30AM - 27/03/2011

Melbourne.~

2011-02-07T22:28:00.000+11:00

So i departed on the 5th of Feb in pursuit of a better future..
with the mixture of tears and i dont know what..
I departed from Kuala Lumpur to Melbourne..

now 2nd day here..
im still getting use to many things..
i cried every hour from the moment the flight took off..
Today i didnt cry as much but i still cried.
tears seems to be so cheap..
I miss everyone..

My touching moments for the past 2 days:
- 1st day i cried once every hour.
- i cry myself to sleep the last 2 night.. *let see what will happen tonight!*
- ill cry each time my dad calls.
- lil sis called, i cried instantly.
- webcam with syaf. i cried just awhile cos he made me laugh just almost instantly.!
- webcam with lil bro and cried too.
- webcam with abg azrul,kak erna, riza and a.j Kode celebrating anya's 3rd birthday..i cried too!

now i know.. attending a birthday party is still possible even thought you are a thousand miles apart.!

KESAS Highway. Part II

2011-01-14T18:37:00.000+11:00

As mentioned i takmau drive thru the booth that makcik stations...
AND..
After many successful avoids, this morning i sangkut.!
Damn it.!!

This morning bila sampai kat the toll booth, i glanced at the attendance's name
and i saw "Nor Azizah"
at that moment i really wanted to slam my head to the stearing..

haiya..
so, dgn muka selamba i gave her RM 2.20
i also made sure that i inspect the coins to confirm no foreign currency terselit bersama many-many times .

and as for the makcik, the moment she saw my face she smiled like the grinch who stole christmas.!
at that moment i felt like saying "jgn senyum lah makcik.! i know wut is running through ur mind.!"

geram.!

KESAS Highway.

2011-01-04T21:21:00.001+11:00

I now have a habit where i dont use the car radio much anymore,
Kenapa?
Sebab, i usually on either my iPhone or my iPod while driving..
so after months of that same ol'routine..
yesterday marked the most bangang'est kejadian.
Here it goes..~

I left work at about 6.30 with my earphone stuck to my ears with really loud music..
I started my journey home..
Approaching the toll gate.. mcm pemandu-pemandu lain..
I slow kan kereta and turunkan tingkap..
Then i korek-korek the coin box for 20cents
and handed the coin to the makcik,before reaching for my wallet to get another RM 2.
while digging my sling bag for my wallet i felt something
waving quite near to my face..
Sebab terasa mcm ada angin berkipas-kipas.. *suspense*
I turned to the right and i saw the toll gate makcik trying to call out for me.
the moment i looked at her face her lips was moving..
obviously she was saying sumthing but i cudnt hear (Volume too loud)..
so, i gave her the hold on signal and i cabut my ear piece and said,

Me: Yer makcik, ada apa..?

Toll Gate Makcik: Takde apa nak, nie anak bagi duit Siam la..tak boleh terima nie nak..

Me: Eh.! yeke..? Maaf lah cik.. saya baru balik dari krabi.. heheheh(Alasan je tu nak cover malu.. padahal dah 3 bulan balik dari krabi..)
Nah, ni duit Malaysia *handing her the correct currency*
Sorry Ye makcik.. *sambil senyum meleret*

Toll Gate Makcik: *Smiled* Takpe.. Terima Kasih, Hati-hati..

Me: Sama-Sama cik.. Bye.~

i hope i'll never drive thru the booth she stations anymore.!

15 Hari Yang Lepas.!

2010-12-30T19:24:00.001+11:00

Exactly 15 days dari last upadate.! Pemalas punya budak.!
Sumpah, bukan malas cuma rasa mcm takde story to share..
takde la as in takde tu takde langsung..
ader la benda-benda menarik yg jadi..
tapi mcm pendek2 jer.. nak citer gak ke?
baik compile banyak2 pastu sembur dlm satu post..
boleh ke mcm tu? caaaaaan..~

Memang caaaaan..
tapi skrng masahlahnyer is,
aku dah lupa benda2 yg jadi.!
haaa mampus. satu haram dah takleh tulis...

hurm..
Owh, hari tu result PMR release,
Im so happy sebab Daniel dapat 4A's 2B's and 2C's
and also for Q who scored full A's.!

Congrats to you both.!
Daniel, i owe you your achievement angpow..
As for Q nanti mintak ur uncle belanja k?
All the best for your future boys.!

orait besides that.
wud be the Suzuki AFF between
Malaysia and Indonesia.!
What a crazy match that was,
i think i enjoyed the one at Indo ground the most
dont ask me why coz, i dont even know why.

Semalam pun bday the Prince of My heart..
i still owe u a birthday present kan?
ermm kak long, really dont know wut to get u la babe..
hurmm.. takpe la.. InsyAllah,
one of these days ill take you out for Shopping k?
...............

Haaaa.. see i concluded all the remaining 15 days.!
hahahah! :P

malasnya!

2010-12-15T13:17:00.000+11:00

woot! woot! lama giler tak update..
sgt sgt takde story nak merepek nie..

sebabnya lately mmg semuanya over the top.
busy sgt-sgt. keje lagi nak terbang lagi..
pastu ada bday papa, awal muharram, the unexpected meeting, drop by monash,
kak ana nak tunang owh abgku jatuh bahu terlepas soket.!
peeergh~! sakit kot! @_@

takde banyak mana pun... tapi seriously mmg malas amat la nk update
mmg tak tau kenapa.. cerita tu ader la..
tapi tak tau nak cerita yg mana..
sebab dlm semua kejadian yg best tu ada gak smthing yg takmo diremember
its like in order for me to forget some bad stuffs,
i have to forget all the good ones entirely.

ok takmo tulis dah.
bye.

Life's

2010-12-02T18:33:00.000+11:00

When u tot that's it.
its not, actually.

Gila Bola.

2010-11-29T19:08:00.000+11:00

Gila Bola..

Ada aku kata aku nak tulis pasal world cup?
Takde kan?
haaa.. kalau gituh, baca dulu sampai abis k?

Benar Kata Pujangga,
Soccer is a Language that is understood by all across the world.

Kejadian yang membuatku senyum sendiri,

Tempat Kejadian: Stadium Curry House
Perlawanan bola yang telah mencetus pelbagai ragam emosi.
ada yg muka sengeh, ada yg muka mcm nak telan kuali roti canai mamak tuh,
ada yang muka mcm dah naik menyampah, ada yang muka bangga mcm lah dia yg score goal tuh.
ada yang muka tak heran langsung..
haaa.. ini ialah orng2 yang mcm mama.. selalu megkritik peminat bola..
kata mama, "awat laa depa nie sebijik bola dok berebut..pi la beli sorang sebijik kan senang.."
owh mama, tidak kah mama faham keindahhan bola?
nampak sah TAK! lagi mau tanya ka?

ok ok.. berbalik pada scene di mamak..
Di akhir perlawanan.. apabila ref meniup wisel dgn panjangnya..
mereka semua bangun.. bertepuk tangan..
dan menepuk bahu tanpa mengira kenal atau tidak lawan atau kawan.

aku bangga.
aku kagum.

.The Beauty of Soccer.

Raya 0h Raya.~

2010-11-18T14:57:00.001+11:00

Raya Haji pun kira raya la jugak kan.?
and maybe sebab raya dia last for a day jer..
Ia sgt mengelamkabut kan.. mana taknyer..
raya puasa ada sebulan nak merapu yg tah ke haper haper..
tapi Raya Haji ada sehari jer..

macam tahun-tahun sesudah..
tahun nie pun giler kalut punya prep,
lebih mengalutkan sebab takde maid..

macam-macam nak kene buat,
to make the matter worst,
entah caner ter-buat medical check-up appointment
on the petang raya,

orang amik cuti sehari sebelum raya nak balik kampung,
yang aku lak amik cuti sebab nak gi medical..
hape punya tuuurr la..~

lepas2 medical check-up terus balik umah,
kerana di sana tugas menanti..
tugas apa.?

meyapu, megemop, memasak, menyebuk, merepek, meraban..
segalanyer lah.!

kira dari pagi mmg non-stop punya dok cha-cha marba punya keje dok buat..

malamnyer laaak.. kene plak gi Mydin Mall sebab ada je la daily groceries yg dah
abis.. ditambah dgn barang2 rencah masak yg dah habis sebab masak juadah nak raya,

kat mydin mama pun apa lagi, mak aih! macam kera dapat bunga..
haaa tu dia mengelipet pi sana sini dok amik barang..
kesiaaan aku tgk.. tapi aku nak buat mcm mana..
aku boleh tolong..

tengok jer la..

tgh nak balik kat parking lot yg luas mcm dua stgh padang bola tu..
aku amik la penyapu yg mama beli tu..
aku baru ingat nak buat mcm pedang pusing2 dgn batang peyapu tu..
*ala-ala berangan mcm dlm citer shaolin*

tetiba aku perasan mama tgh pandang aku,
woooot.! kecot perot kot.~!
giler punya jelingan dia bagi kat aku..
time tu aku dah tau.. mmg aku nanti kene sedekah lah malam2 raya nie..
kak ana pun dah terdiam dari dia dok tgk2 aku tgh ready nak bershaolin..

serentak tu.. aku pun,

put on your thinking cap boys and girrrlllss.~
dlm kepala beeeeik punya ligan dok cari idea nak elak kene marah..

tiba-tiba, aku dengan selambanya...

berdiri posisi ala-ala rock star,
pegang penyapu mcm ala-ala pegang letrik guitar
dan memandangkan tak sempat nak plan lagu apa nak nyanyi..
aku tibai jer nyanyi lagu nie dekat tengah-tengah parking lot Mydin Mall,

haaaa.. amik kau rock kapak terkeluar malam-malam raya yang hening itu..

mama dari nak marah terus tersipu-sipu nak tahan gelak..
namun, dengan muka senyum ketat mama itu lah..
aku yakin bahawa aku takkan kene marah diatas aksi yang sungguh memalukan itu..

memalukan ke.? aku rasa mcm orait jer..~

Krabi Mengugat Cintaku.

2010-11-04T14:07:00.000+11:00

Namun cintaku tetap utuh hanya utk Tioman.
hahahah start daaah meraban yg tah pape..

tapi serious.. secantik2 alam bawah laut Krabi,
Cantik lagi yg di Tioman..
ini yg buat mcm nak pergi lagi jer ke Tioman.
Nanti la kumpul duit.. Duit dah banyak abis gi Krabi..
nak saving utk kegunaan nak ehem..ehem lagi.. *Sorry takleh citer apa ehem-ehem tu lagi sebab belum buat official announcement*

ingat nak attached photos.. tapi takyah laa
tengok je la kat Krabi Pics.. ada macam-macam pics
dari yang senonoh hingga la yg kurang senonoh. hahahah

macam-macam yang menarik kat Krabi tu tetapi
pemandangan dia mmg breath taking sungguh.!
lagi-lagi Maya Beach, alaaa yg Leonardo De Caprio shooting citer The Beach tuh. mmg locals kat situ pun mengecohkan hal tu je la pun.. so, dengan ini.. saya mengisytiharkan Beach Favourite saya buat masa ini ialaaahh...

...MAYA BEACH-KRABI,THAILAND!...
dan memendangkan ini favourite beach, jadi gambar dia bley la nak insert..

Seterusnya bagi favourite Island pula..
jatuh kepada..... *Drum Rolls..*

...PHI-PHI ISLAND-KRABI,THAILAND!...

Haaa.. itu jelah nak ckp pun.. Krabi secara keseluruhan mmg cantik.. tapi klu snorkeling, TIOMAN tetap dihatiku.~

Sekian.

Cherry Berry.~

2010-11-04T13:45:00.000+11:00

Ha Amik kau.!
Apsal amik aku.?
Sebab dah lama tak bukak blog sampai nak login pun dah lupa password. Tapi nasib baik dapat ingat gak.

Err..
Sumpah takde citer nak tulis owh.!
ermm apa kata citer pasal fenomena "CHERRY BERRY"
ya, itu dia tuan-tuan dan puan-puan..
Fenomena yg melanda diriku sejak hari Ahad yang lalu.
Takde teruk mana pun, Ahad tu je la pun muntah2 bagaikan fire hydrant meletup. Bila gi doctor pun kene bebel..
Salah makankah aku? iya! semua ini salah In Flight Asean Fried Rice with Satay.. Dengar nama pun dah buat aku mcm nak muntah.! DAMN IT!

Masa kat Krabi, elok jer.. melantak segala jenis makanan
duduk atas boat mcm orng laut yg bergelora pun elok jer..
tapi serious laa wa cakap lu.. Laut Andaman kot, Giler bergelora.. Syok la main air..
tapi klu nak compare snorkeling trip di Krabi ngan Snorkeling trip kat Tioman..
TIOMAN tetap dihatiku~ haha chewah..
eh, jap! kan dah melalut kemana-mana..
aku nak citer pasal "Cherry Berry" je sebenarnya..

Tapi ada je link dengan Krabi sebab aku makan penyebab Cherry Berry masa dlm flight nak balik dari Krabi.

haa... itu la.. Dari Sunday ke today dah yang dah Thursday..
Masih ku terasa effectnya.~

bila kah kan berakhir..?
100plus dah berbotol2..
Vitagen dah berpack-pack..
tetapi "Cherry-Berry" tetap menjadi pengunjung tegar.~

p/s: Cherry Berry - Cirit Birit

Tak.! Tak.! saya tak curi apa-apa..

2010-10-14T22:04:00.000+11:00

Ok, as much as title di atas amat menakutkan..
so was i.

peristiwa kelabu *bukan hitam, sebab takde la critical mana*
ermm on Sunday i ikut papa ngan mama gi Empire Gallery sebab papa
nak cari supplements kat Himalaya punya boutique kat sana.
Then lepas beli Supplements tu semua..
kitorng went straight to Dorothy Perkins, papa kata nak usha baju.
Papa suka sgt gi sana dia kata baju-baju dia cantik and harga very reasonable.
tapi sayangnyer.. anak dia yg sorang nie sangat tak
meng-appreciate fashion.
balik-balik rembat jeans ngan t-shirt sudey.~
then papa pun start la belek bags and clothes semua..
bila nak bayar baru we all sedar we didnt bring the member card,
member card dgn adik dirumah.. then caner nak dapat discount.?
So since promoter dah kenal sgt eith our faces dia kata datang je esok
and make the neccesary payment and bla..bla..

Dengan termaktubnya perjanjian itu,
papa cakap "ok, ashagirl tomorrow after work u drop by and collect what we have selected, jgn lupa bawak member card."
*ashagirl tu my nama timangan dari papa-mama.*

Come Monday,
lepas keje i call kak ana, and bgtau dia tugasan khas yg diberi papa malam sebelumnya..
kak ana tanpa berfikir panjang terus meng-agree utk ikut..
lepas setting2 tempat nak jumpa semua.. kami berjumpa tepat jam
7.30malam.

sampai je kat Dorothy Perkins kitorng masuk je..
bunyi censor kat entrance outlet tu.
sungguh la terkejut monkey dibuatnya..
tapi we all buat bodo dan berkata dlm hati,
"apa bangang punya censor.. tak shopping lagi sibuk bunyi censor."

Lepas Collect and Bayar,
We all langkah keluar, sampai je kat censor tu..
tau-tau censor tu bunyi lagi, tak pasal-pasal we all patah balik pergi kat counter sebab cashier tu kata mungkin ada tag yang lupa nak dicabut. So well pun ok la.. dorang geledah semua bag shopping tu
and kata, "eh, takde pun.. macam dah cabut semua.. ermm censor tu problem kot."
lepas dorang apologize kitorng gerak kuar.. and censor tak bunyi dah..
Ammiiiinnn..~

Tiba-Tiba, Jeng..Jeng..Jeng..
Terdengar suara makhlus yg halus *takdela nak halus mana pun* di telinga..
suara tu kata, "babe, singgah Tangs jap.."
Owh.! suara kak ana .. hehehehe..
dengan langkah Bismillahirahmanirahim.. we all langkah masuk..

TIba-Tiba!
Sebaik saje melangkah menembusi kawasan censor...
Tet..!Tet..!Tet..!Tet..!Tet..!
Dia bunyiiik laaagiii..~
tapi kali ni bukan censor Dorothy Perkins..
But the censor from Tangs.
waaah.~ apa lagi.. berduyun-duyun pak guard- pak guard
yang pelbagai rupa dan size datang menghampiri kami yg sedang panik.

Kejap tu Supervisor Store tu datang dia kata,
"Sila ikut kami ke meja sana Cik."
Kami tak buat apa-apa cuma nak check, mungkin kedai tadi ada tag yg tak cabut..

Jenuh gak kitorng explain.. benda yg jadi kat Dorothy Perkins
tapi dorang tetap nak check..
So berani kerana benar.. We all bagi la dorang geledah bag bag shopping..
then semua bag bag shopping dorang letak atas scanner tapi tak bunyi pun..
so aku ngan rela hati bagi la aku punya sling bag utk digeledah..
the moment my bag touched the censor.. benda tu triggrd..
apa lagi.. sah sah la ada benda yg menyebabkan benda tu bunyi..

then orng tu told me to empty my bag bit by bit..
nasib baik i bukan jenis yg simpan beauty parlour dalam bag..
so i keluarkan kunci, bekas ubat and walet.

after dah keluar kan 3 item tu.. dia lalukan kat censor lagi..
and censor tu still bunyi..
then the last item dalam bag tu is the office magnetic tag and my current novel..
orng tu muka dah pelik.. tau-tau bila dia lalukan novel tu ada bunyi censor..
orng tu flip through buku tu and jumpa magnetic bar code yg terselit somewhre in the middle of the bag..

rupa-rupanya tag bodoh itu la yg telak menganggu shopping kitorng malam tu..
lepas settle semua dgn security..
masing-masing minta maaf..

aaaannnd back tu membeli belah.!

oh! sebab magnetic barcode tu tak dibuang is because the book was bought online..
and they will just deliver the book without removing the barcode..

Moral of the story: lain kali lepas beli barang online.. sila cari dan buang magnetic code.

Sekian Terima Kasih.

Dont Quote me.!..... Please Do...

2010-10-08T21:20:00.000+11:00

i tot i wasnt gonna update my blog today,
coz nothing blog-able happend today
until...
i had a sgt super sengal chat with my blog mentor;
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
me_myself_and_i: im gonna go get anya after work

sya_fique: cakap uncle kirim salam
sya_fique: haha
sya_fique: uncle says hello

me_myself_and_i: nanti sebok suruh i call u nanti

sya_fique: suka dia call
sya_fique: heheehe

me_myself_and_i: itu la
me_myself_and_i: nanti merepek yg bukan2

sya_fique: uncle.....
sya_fique: ini anya
sya_fique: weekkkk

me_myself_and_i: hahahaha
me_myself_and_i: tak pasal2 dia weeek

sya_fique: dia betul 2 weekkk kan?
sya_fique: towards the phone

me_myself_and_i: yer la.. mcm la u nampak dia wek

sya_fique: hahaa
sya_fique: jahat
sya_fique: dia ingat video call!

me_myself_and_i: mmg dia selalu mcm tu
me_myself_and_i: pernah when we tell her to say bye.. sebab nak hangup
me_myself_and_i: she literally waves

sya_fique: hahaah comel
sya_fique: bbbyyyyeeeee

me_myself_and_i: hahahaha

sya_fique: no really
sya_fique: byeeee
sya_fique: i nak ciao

me_myself_and_i: owh! i tot so.
me_myself_and_i: GILA.!

sya_fique: boss xde

me_myself_and_i: hahahahaha

sya_fique: dun quote me!
sya_fique: bahaya blogger ni

me_myself_and_i: i dont care!!
me_myself_and_i: nak jugak!

sya_fique: copy + paste chat

me_myself_and_i: hahahahah

sya_fique: hello feeza's blog readers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

me_myself_and_i: and no am not gonna quote that

sya_fique: pls do!

me_myself_and_i: its gonna be weird saying hello to urself syaf...

sya_fique: owh me alone ke

me_myself_and_i: coz ur my only reader.!
me_myself_and_i: hahahaahahah

sya_fique: xpe
sya_fique: nanti grow la readers u
sya_fique: thats how i started too
sya_fique: chewah....

** agaknya ini caranya seorang mentor memberi galakkan kepada menteenya utk berblog..
they will randomly say "dont quote me!" but suddenly.. adds please do..
so in the end.. nak tak nak kene update blog jugak.. sebab kene quote mentor! hahahaha..
*ini mentee baik, dgr ckp mentor :)*

mentor ini juga hebat dlm memberi kata2 semangat bila mentee kata "no one reads my blog laa..",

i agree with u syaf, banyak sgt silent reader.. apa la salahnya kalau leave a sign sikit kan..?
tsk! tsk! tsk!

Demam Ku Kebah Bomb!

2010-10-07T21:41:00.000+11:00

Since dah promise dgn azam la konon nya nak update rajin-rajin..
ini dia cobaan pertama.. agak-agak tak berapa nak sukses..

semalam ye ye je pun nak update sebab the day before dah dgn yo-yo nye kata
nak update kalau bley daily..
tau-tau hari tuesday gi tinggal nya laptop kat office..
Rabu dah MC.. nak update ikut celah mana kalau laptop takde..? ye dak?
nak guna iphone yg ala-ala canggih manggih mau la berpinor bijik mata nak type..
Jadi 'Qada hari nie je la..

Okla kan dari tkde langsung.. diam-diam suda..~
Hari nie dengan panas demam suam-suam kuku kaki kambing gurun sahara..
aku melangkah dgn longlai gemalai ala-ala ayu
*ayu lah sgt!* gi meneruskan perjuangan di opis..

sebelum tu dalam kereta masa on d way nak gi opis nokia ku berbunyi melalak lagu thinking of u kate perry
*owh sms rupanya..* kak jaja mengmesset ini katanya:-

kak jaja: sampai opis nanti bgtau..

sejam sebelum tu..
kakjaja messet gak masa aku dok tgh siap nk gi opis

kak jaja: nak nasi lemak tak?
feeza: boleh je! tekak tak sakit dah..

disclaimer: mesti korang ingat masa aku tgh drive yg kak jaja messet
aku terus immediately reply kan? kan? kan? alaaa aku tau.. *manusia suka buruk sangka*
tetapi... a'a'aaaa.. no..no..no bebeh..
sesungguhnya aku tak reply..
because ladies and gentlewomen that will be bridging the 12 Shell Safety Rules..
Don't text and drive.. but makan okay..*pandai-pandai menambah*

so aku agak2 bila kak jaja kata bgtau bila dah smpi tu sebab nak passing nasi lemak la tu..
dan... mmg betul.. setibanya aku di opis ku mengeintercom kak jaja
dan maka dgn itu.. tiba la nasi lemak ayam sebungkus yg sgt sedap..
kami makan la beramai-ramai kat pantry..
takde la ramai sgt pun dgn simanja kila,mary nyot dan man cerp.
berempat je pun tapi riuh mcm berlapanpuloh!

kitorng makan nasi lemak, sandwich, karipap dan minum
kopi pracampur hang tuah bukan hankyu-jaya yg bau dia sgt perrrgh
sedap golek punya.. namun akan tetapi rasa dia lagi lah terlebih-lebih melampau-lampau sedapnya..
"kenapa begitu murid-murid.??"
"YA..! kerana saya yang buat! terima kasih terima kasih.. tochey tochey.."

dan dengan ini Thank you lah kak jaja utk nasi lemak itu..
nanti belanja lagi okay? walaupun saya tak demam..

aaaah.. lagi satu,
aku dah bagi tau kat mentor blog Encik Syaf
yg blogku ini dah beroperasi setelah mengumpul habuk dan sesawang setelah sekian lama..
dan ini katanya:-

sya_fique: siap ada to do list

sya_fique: bagus la
sya_fique: wah dah ada banyak link
sya_fique: gotta go
sya_fique: byeeeee

aik? angin takde ribut takde.. alih-alih dah bye..
rupanya? boss dia takde daaa.. dia pun apa lagi?
cha alip bot - CABUT.!.~

dan aku pun apa lagi.?
.........
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.
balik la!

Guess Who's Back.!

2010-10-05T17:44:00.000+11:00

Stay Put peeps.!, Cos hopefully more posts will be coming you're way.~

Before the decision was made..

2010-10-01T20:42:00.000+10:00

me: i got this
anonymous: ok good.. u should go..
me: really.? *yipee*
anonymous: you should start preparing already..
me: yes right away.. *inside: i will study hard. i will and i must!*

Done.

2010-09-29T20:09:00.000+10:00

Decision Made. NO Turning Back.

2010-07-27T13:26:00.000+10:00

hari ini,

mcm biasa semakin hari keadaan semakin menyakitkan.

sampai aku tak tau apa yg aku patut buat.

Pleading..

2010-03-10T15:43:00.000+11:00

YaAllah kenapa manusia tak pernah puas menyakiti orng lain.?
Tolonglah jgn kacau kami lagi..
Live your own life.
Leave us alone..

hari ini.. bukan smalam atau esok.

2010-02-05T03:12:00.000+11:00

hermm bersarang blog yang satu ini...
perlu rasa nya ku coretkan apa yg terjadi..
untuk beberapa hari kebelakangan ini..
keadaan agak jauh lebih baik untuk ayu dan sikacak dia.
harap berterusan.. tapi ayu tetap rasa sedih dan ada kala ragu2.
aku tak salahkannya.. tapi nak buat mcm mana si kacak sedang berada
dlm kemelut yg tak sudah2. moga2 ayu dikurniakan-NYA kesabaran..

ermm.. hari nie penyu tu muncul lagi.. cuba menagih kembali
apa yang telah aku buang jauh2.
perlukah aku mengutipnya kembali dan berikan pada si penyu?
hahaha.. masih dalam pertimbangan..
dia sia2 kan 4 peluang yg aku bagi pada dia..
peluang yg kelima? sungguh nipis peluang nya..

hari nie juga aku buat keputusan utk tak mengharapkan apa2
dari pencoret semangat tu..
ada sesuatu yg dikatakan hari ini membuatkan aku tersedar
kalau dia semestinya bukan orng itu.
orang apa? orang yg ku cari selama ini.
bukannye aku pernah cari pun.

dlm perjalanan pulang bertarung di lautan
aku rindu pada hero boy, macho guy dan smart guy..
apa khabar agaknya mereka? sihat kah?
atau nakal? hahaha aku rindu..
Yaallah, pelihara lah mereka sebaiknya..

hari nie.. aku memutuskan puteri lah nama panggilannya..
insyaallah.. puteri akan dicipta kan, diadakan dan diserahkan.. Doaku setiap hari..
walaupun jika ada sebelumnya.. dia akan ku panggil putera.

princesss.! bakal bergembira..
baru ku sedar tak sebegitu jauh dari ku..
tapi aku belum dapat memutuskan penghargaan utknya..
Lindungilah princess YaAllah..

ermm malam terus mengamit.
aku harus pergi..
ermm utk yg seterusnya nanti..
akan ku ceritakan ttg lopes dan ulam.

selamat malam..~

-blank-

2010-01-22T17:16:00.000+11:00

i wanna let it out.

i wanna get ideas

but to whom should i go to

where should i run to?

.............

2010-01-20T03:00:00.000+11:00

Bismillahirahmanirrahim..

Yallah..
kalau aku akan kehilangan dia sekali lagi
aku redha.

aku dah tak larat mempertahankan sesuatu yg tak pasti.
hidup ini terlalu singkat utk bersedih..
tetapi terlalu banyak perkara yg menyedihkan sering berlaku.

Yallah aku redha dan aku terima segalanya dgn hati yg
tenang.
Yaallah.. aku memohon padamu..
jgn lah kau biarkan ianya berlaku.

Amin Amin Yarabbal Alamin..

wanna,dont wanna

2010-01-08T21:31:00.000+11:00

i wanna do what i do best.
i wanna keep it in.

i dont wanna say it out.
i dont wanna let em hear

i wanna write
i wanna rant

i dont wanna be you
i dont wanna be me

i wanna be what ur not
i wanna be what iam.

i dont wanna tell why
i dont wanna say what

i wanna be here
and
i wanna be there.

for the longest time

2008-10-26T05:49:00.003+11:00

for the longest time today i tot is that one day we sat and watched a movie together. a full whole movie without me getting up to get a drink,snacks,toilet break or what so ever.probably that the movie we watched is a movie that has what we both enjoy.

we do watch the media box everyday. but not quite religiously because ive got a problem with staying put at 1 place for a long time.but this time was different.i really enjoyed the whole movie.especially watching it with u coz i know u enjoyed it too as much as i did.and hell yeah im gonna watch it again but after exams of course.the movie was a good book- runaway for today.

im so gonna get the earlier version of the movie we watched today but its on a different title.i think its impossible to get a copy of the movie now. but im gonna try.so mel if ur reading this.. ur gonna help me with this one. we r gonna go dvd hunting after exams. no matter how much its gonna costs im gonna pay. i cant get it downloaded. too old i think.

so dear papa, after exams ill go get the dvd u said. -Abba movie- if i got the title right.and we'll watch it again together ok. like we did tonight.

i had a good book-get-away thanks to Mama-Mia and papa.

p/s: kin,i guess ull agree with me on this right?its been for like the longest time kan since we last sat like dat with papa.

=)

life.?

2008-09-20T01:45:00.006+10:00

ull never know how much u love someone untill they are gone..
ive heard of this phrase alot of times..
still i fail to understand nor feel the lost..
untill i experienced it..

a year ago in february..
i lost a cousin and after a few days after that i lost my grandma..
many years before my grand aunt..
and when i was young..i think when i was a bout 7 or 8
a best fren..

but probably that time i was too young to understand i lost a fren and a grand aunt..
because when my mum told me i lost my fren..
she actually hold me tight..
clearly i can still remember..
my mum hold me close to her and said very slowly..
"asha-girl, uncle sultan and the family met with an accident on the way from kampung..
and we lost Rizal and Aliah"
As far as i can remember, i just kept quiet and went on with my daily activities..
and from that day on never i asked about Aliah nor Rizal..
untill our family were reunited many years after dat..
from Uncle Sultan wife's face i know she misses her daughter and son..
still i didnt feel how its like..

then..
when my grand aunt passed on..
still my tears was frozen..
not a drop..
but i know i still think of her..
because.. everytime i "balik kampung"
ill stay at my aunts place which is about 500meters away from my grandaunt..
and from meters away id scream "mak tok..!! mak tok!! mak tok!!" as i make way to her house..
and as soon as i arrive..a good cup of kopi kampung is prepared for me..
she just knows my favourite...
when i mess around with the turkeys and the goose at the yard..
ill run screaming for her and she'll come to my safety..
chasing those annoying 2 feet creatures away from me..
also when i tease my aunty that has "melatah" problem..
she will be the one that will save me..

so clear i can remember my aunt was sweeping the lawn..
i poked her and make her dance and say ridiculous things, then my mum came from the back and poke my aunt and said."pukul dia.! pukul dia!"
u know how ppl with melatah problem some how will lost their conciousness..
and my aunt started whacking me with the broom stick..
i ran as fast as i could..
she chased me around the whole kampung..
when i was just about the reach my grandaunts house i fell..
and my aunt took the chance and whacked me with the broom..
still being uncouncious..
mak tok came and snatched the broom away..
haih.. i miss mak tok..
the memory still lives on...

last year..
my close cousin passed away..
due to post-natal complications
which is mainly the doctors fault.
when i got the news
i screamed so hard and cried so hard..
that my dad came running..
dat night itself we rushed to Nibong Tebal..
the whole journey i was crying and at the same time reciting Yaasin
over and over again..
the whole night i cried..
the whole of the next day i cried..
till before he body was taken out of the house..
i hugged her and cried...
telling her how much im gonna miss her..
at the cemetary i almost fainted..
i couldnt take it that she left us.
hah! finally! my tears didnt freeze..

i came back to kl..
with all the memories we had..

i tried to move on..

but not long just a few days after my cousin left us.

my grand ma passed away.
it was a second shock for me..
to make it even more shocking.
she took her last breath in my arms.
i was the one right in front of her..
when she closed her eyes slowly..
she went so calmly...
i tot she fell asleep..
as i glanced to the clock it was 10.45am
my mum's faced changed..
and ilooked at my mum and said..
"no ma.. atema is ok.. dia tido.. i think she is tired over the pain due to the cancer"
i was so positive.
little that i know. she has left the world.
the doctor cam at 11.00.
and she was checking my grandma
and turned to us and said.. im sorry..
she's no more.
i stared at the doctor.
i said "no, it cudnt be. i saw she fell a sleep.
if true. give me a time"
and the doctor said 10.45.
all i said "YaAllah, ma. i saw she fell alseep at that exact time."
the next thing i know i was on the floor. cudnt believe what happend..
a while after my step mum arrived.
i was already calling all family and frens to break the news..
while both my mum was trying to find the right words in
how to tell my dad that he lost his mum..

at 1 point i tot everyhting that happend was a bit too much to handle.
i cudnt stop crying. but i had to stand strong.
to help prepare my grandma's last journey..
Alhamdulillah.. everything went on so well not a single problem..

recently..
an aunt of mine..
passed on after almost 3 years struggling with cancer..
i was in Contemporary Fiction class when my bro called telling she is getting weaker.
at that moment i decided to skip all classes for the day.
i informed Dr.Andrew and Dr.Helen and rushed home to fetch my mum..
when we were only a few meters away from the hospital
my dad called. we were too late..
we didnt get to see her before she closed her eyes forever..
still we dropped by the hospital and then took her children home..
to prepare for the funeral..
my aunt's youngest son Hafiez was with me.
i carried him trying to console him.
i cudnt hold my tears when he said,
"kak feeza, hafiez taknak jadi anak yatim.. hafiez dah takde mama."
from being able to stay strong i cried with him..
im so close to my aunty aswell.
as things are sure so so extremely different without her around.
seeing her family now, trying to cope with their lost really opened my eyes.

especially how you should love and care for ur old folks and those around you.
dont regret when they are gone.
ive got frends that lost their mother or father.
and at that point i feel im lucky to still have my parents around.
coz what in the world would i do without them?
i now try to always be home to be with them.
try to spent every second i have to be with them.
i also try my hardest to divide my time to be with my other loved ones.
my beloved friends.
hanging out is a big agenda in my schedule nowadays.
with uni friends, school friends and everyone..
id make unsual drive to kl to see my sister who studies there..
a silly sms to my cousins. a phone call to tease my sweetheart ameiyrul.
my little bro.
a mass sms to my buddies.
an effort to be at every gathering planned..

last 2 and half years was a stress..
too much happend.
that needed a hard consideration of wut's good and bad.
a decision to be made. and a decision taken.
a decision that ill NEVER regret..

what i tot it is. it not what it is.

hmmm..
as for the poeple who left us to be with god: Al-Fatihah.
for us here..
life has to go on..
yang pergi tetap akan pergi.
sayangi setiap insan yg masih ada.
pastikan kenangan-kenangan yg tercipta
sebagai kenangan manis yg akan senantiasa terpahat di hati dan minda.

kepada insan yg telah kembali kepadaNya - AlFatihah..
kepada insan yg masih ada disampingku.
ketahuilah bahawa, setiap nafas yang ku ambil
kusertakan degan iringan doa agar kebahagiaan dan kerahmatan yang Esa akan sentiasa disamping kalian semua..
kasih dan sayang ku hanya utk kalian semua.

Kalian yg kusayang.
walau hujan kan membasahi bumi,
setiap titisan itu mewakili doaku buat kalian,
walau matahari kan mengontangkan bumi,
kasihku takkan sekali-kali kering buat kalian,
walau salji kan menyejukn bumi,
sayangku akan sentiasa menghangatkan kalian,

sekuat arus yg menghanyutkan bahtera dia lautan,
tiada yg dapat menghanyutkan diriku dari kalian.
sekuat petir di langit yg biru,
kuat lagi ingatan ku pada kalian.
sebanyak titisan air di dunia ini,
tak tertanding dgn titisan air mata kegembiraan ku yg bakal menitis atas kejayaan kalian.
biar jasad ku tidak mengizinkan ku berada disamping kalian,
mengertilah bahawa doaku kan menjadi teman kalian walau di mana jua.
InsyAllah.

-feeza-
12.55 am.

..Syafique..

2008-09-04T02:24:00.006+10:00

To: the one who thought me how to dream. the one who inspires.a friend.the other half.

thank you. for as much as uve been there for me.im here for u for whatsoever reason. good or bad. thick or thin.

Go for your dreams.!

i know ull conquer your dreams one day!

I'll Stand By You.

Oh, why you look so sad?

Tears are in your eyes

Come on and come to me now.

Don't be ashamed to cry,

let me see you through

Cause I've seen the dark side too.

When the night falls on you,

you don't know what to do,

Nothing you confess could make me love you less

I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you, I'll stand by you.

So, if you're mad get mad, don't hold it all inside,

Come on and talk to me now. A

nd hey, what you got to hide?

I get angry too

But I'm alot like you.

When you're standing at the crossroads,

don't know which path to choose,

Let me come along,

cause even if your wrong I'll stand by you,

I'll stand by you,

won't let nobody hurt you, I

'll stand by you. T

ake me into your darkest hour, and I'll never desert you. I'll stand by you.

And when, when the night falls on you baby,

you're feeling all alone,

You won't be on your own,

I'll stand by you.

I'll stand by you

I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you.

I'll stand by you Take me in into your darkest hour and I'll never desert you

I'll stand by you.

that short trip

2008-08-28T02:39:00.011+10:00

it was at 9.ooam saturday when my dad decided to go back to penang..
since it has been a long time since i last went back to penang.
i was so excited even tho my hand was sore for i donno why.

i packed all my stuffs an waited in the family hall for everyone to get ready.
filled-up my sling bag with my iPod,2 books beloved for contem fic class and also the inspirational book that syaf gave during the futsala nd dinner lepak day..
soon at 12 we were all ready to go.

my dad gave me the keys and told me to drive.
apart of me tot he was joking cos i jokingly said the night before if he is tired to drive im willing to do it for him..
but upon seeing him being selamber getting into the backseat with my mum and my sister came to the front seat i just took a deep breath and atrted the engine and we were on our way.
before heading for the highway we stopped by for petrol and food stuffs!
100plus,chips,coffee and what not.

i was nervous since its the 1st ill be driving on a long distance journey..
still i acted cool.. ignored the pain on my hand
i started going 140 mph and more.

it was fun. sang the whole CD of some random songs.
then we changed to Kenny G latest album..
a whole album of relaxing tunes...

soon it has been 2 hours and i finnaly approached Bukit Gantang R&R..
we stopped for a break, had lunch then it was my turn to relax and my dad drove.
at the back seat i kept myself busy listening to music, reading and sms-ing till i fell asleep.
by the time i got up was a bout after an hour we were already at the port waiting for the ferry.

the best part.
the moment we entered the ferry i was already staring at the sea.
happily dreaming and sms-ing untill my mum came next to me.
and said "carefull with ur phone, unless you want to give it to the jellyfish so they can SOS all they want."
i was wondering why SOS and not SMS.?
nvm, i just continued sms-ing and hold on tight-er to my phone.

soon after we reached the Island!
we drove to Queen Street because my dad wanted to meet his old friend at a jewellry shop but it ended up that he's friends were along the whole street, everywhere he went ppl would come up to him and the next thing you know he is telling me who dat person is..
it cud be his classmate, a neighbour, someone who know's my grandfather, his friend's friend and all sorts of possible links..
i just stood there and smiled.. what else can i do.
i was happy seeing my dad happy.

then after all the "jejak-kasih" we headed to bayan lepas nearby Queensbay Mall to go to my Aunt's place.
had dinner and made plans for the night.
the best part of the whole plan was that everyone slept. and only left me,my dad and abng azrul (mia and aezryl's dad).
then we decided to stay home and watch football (arsenal and fullham)
Arsenal lost. haihyah....

at about 2.00am i went and buy this rice that is know as "nasi dalcha"
for my dad and abng azrul. i had a packet also. but didnt finish..
how la to eat at that hour.?

i tot dat night i cud go see the G-hotel that syaf reviewed in his website. and by chance meet my uncle who works in another hotel nearby the G-hotel. but since everyone slept. all plans were cancled. i was suppose to video call syaf also i cudnt coz everywhere i go around the house i cudnt get the 3g coverage. probably i shud have gone to the beach area. at least there comfirm there will be 3G coverage coz i managed to videocall u when u were there.. very bad maxis service.

that night i sat by the window that was onced a door that leads to the rooftop. a tragedy happened a few years back where i plunged in the roof. freaky experience!
but i laughed and fell asleep.

the next morning i had to go by nasi kandar for breakfast and buy a cat carrier.
apparently my dad fell in love at first sight with dat kitten at my aunts place and wants to bring it back to Subang. i tot it was a crazy thing to do.
what made it crazier was i cudnt find a cat carrier dat my dad decided to just use a box.. i freaked out!

we left my aunts house by noon to head back for subang.
thank god my mum let me take the front seat so she and my sis took the backseat with the kitten.
the whole journey back to subang was fine.
untill the cat poo-poo.!
errrrrghh!!!!!!
goo thing we were approching the R&R so my sister could clean the mess.
and thank god there was no smell!

we proceed our journey and arrived subang at almost 10.00pm
as soon as i arrived i unload all the stuff in to the house.
and also the cat. now named as CHOMBIE since its from penang so my dad tot it shud have a penang traditional name. so there u go chombie.
i tot i cud give it some wacky name like i gave to the 2 other cats i have "pieyouwt" and "touweieng" wacky huh!?

seriously this is like the shortest trip ive ever had!
hope it was longer.
so i can go to many places around the island.
1 nite is never enough!

p/s: here's some pics. not quite some. its like the only pics taken.
till then...

ME.!

the cat: chombie

ikut syaf keje!

2008-07-20T02:57:00.005+10:00

alright.. how shall i start..
its been ages since ive last wrote in..
but today im gonna have to write in something..
because today is a special day coz i get to meet syaf..
yang sudah sungguh lama tak jumpa.. rindu giler sgt-sgt!
dah tu.. ikut dia cover event dekat pyramid this morning..
so sikit sebanyak i get to know what he actually does each time he tells me that
he is attending events.

from signing up at the registration table..
to doing the interviews..
mingle around..
and everything..
id say.. syaf uve got guts.
i dont think i berani nak buat mcm yg u buat..
its really gonna take me months to actually do what u did tadi. or perhaps almost everyday..

then after the event..
we walked around jusco.
every single lane
talking..
we met some random people that we thought we wud never bump into.
like the Arts secretary, a senior from Monash and also my high school teacher
Cik. Wan Hasnah.

then..
pegi mkn McD.
even it was a bit pelik.. pasal the cameraman was around..
still we managed to exchange gosssssipppsssss... (the best part? i donno..hahah)

after dat..
we made our way home.. as in me, back home..
syaf kene balik office..
next time i ikut u balik office ek?
if i knew u kene tunggu lama for ur colleague..
i cud have tried to plan my way to follow u.
tag ur car!

anyways..
today was a fun day..
bila nak kuar lagi?
kita plan ek?
or ada event like today?
then i teman u lagi.
hahahah..

owh...
here's a pic from today's event..

wonder.

2008-02-25T03:40:00.002+11:00

im so tired..
i want to sleep...
my mind so messed up?
was it wrong?
why shud all seem to be my mistake?
or is it i shud just shut up and just let things to prolong.?
is that what shud be done?

kak lin

2008-02-20T04:13:00.003+11:00

this is a demo post.. kak lin wanna know about the blogging world..!

have fun..!

p/s: dat is kak lin with adrian.. before all the extra time in gym. hahaha..
better looking now?

a thought...

2007-08-07T00:55:00.000+10:00

laugh and the world will laugh WITH you..

cry and the world will laugh AT you.

no doubts about it..
so true.. cudnt argue more..

at times...

2007-07-31T00:24:00.000+10:00

sometimes when things happens it really makes u wonder if there is actually other people who go thru something that is even worst.. trust me..

u have no idea how bad theirs is..

usually when i have difficulties..

all i can say to myself is dat..

it could have been worst..

so i wont feel dat bad..

even if im feeling extremely awful dat time.

everybody go thru different types of challenges in life..

i mean you cant actually compare how yous may differ from mine..

coz i guess its just how u handle things..

for example; you may once experience falling down a stairs in front of a fren and u were totally embarrassed. suddenly few months later a fren comes and tell you he/she fell from a stairs is front of thier bf/gf and is totally embarrased..

you can say aaaahhh its nothing... of course u can say dat coz ur already over it.. but what happens to the fren who just experienced it a while ago.?

he/she is feeling the same u once felt.

but u just wont get it..

and defenietly ur gonna brag about it to other frens about how an ass ur fren was for making a big deal out of falling of a stairs right?

honestly..

i have many friends who comes from different walk of life..

those really extremely rich ones. never know wut hardship is, some what average ones who deals fairly well with life, and those totally unfortunate ones. to me all of them are the same. i even have friends who have black dark histories. u name it.. i basically have almost all types of ppl as friends. but i see no difference in them.

they are who they are.

unique and special. even they have to face all typs of s*!#s in life.

i guess ur just the one chosen to have made the mistake so it would become a lesson to other people. and the best way of learning is to learn from your mistakes. in other words.. dont repeat it again once u know the consequences.

not all mistakes can be forgiven many times

why i wrote this is to dedicate to a fren..

my fren dont know i have this blog..

so i guess my fren wont be reading this..

wutever its is..

i want my fren to know tht..im her fren always.. even what had happend to her that made her think that id freak out never wanna be her fren again.
i pray to Allah so that she is given the strenght to deal with wud had happend..

..parents..

2007-07-14T01:53:00.000+10:00

hmmm..
I don’t know when it started…
Many comments ive received….
From friends especially,
Like:
-man.. dats hard..
-are they dat strict?
-its like prison.
-hostel warden are better
-I guess I could consider myself lucky

All my answer to dat comment are the same..
YES..

I have very strict parents.
I donno y they are like that but it has been like dat.
Sometimes I feel like a small kid for not being able to go out OFTEN
Going for movies has been like something quite big for me..
And its always not included in the permission asking session..

Id usually say, pa..ma..
I want to go to pyramid.
And they’ll ask Y..
And ill say I need some stufss..(must provide a list)
With who are u going?
Answering just friends is not a valid answer.
Coz they’ll ask don’t they have a name?
Then, wut time going and coming home?
How are u going?
Are u driving or ur fren?

See how hard the process is...*sigh*

And permission can not be seek less then 24 hours prior to the time I plan to go.
so I have to ask at least 2 days before.
Dats why most last minute invitation will be very hard for me to attend..
If I manage to attend it’s always a miracle.

So if I have places to go that I know a week before. Ill tell them a week before and remind them almost everyday till the actual day comes, so they will remember that ive gotten their permission and was allowed to go.

Weekends.! Dats even harder. Especially Sundays.

To get to go out on my own on weekends is impossible.
So I’ve no choice but to go on weekdays (if granted).
I just don’t get it why I cant go on weekends.
When I ask my mum why I cant go out on weekends,
She’ll say because now papa has two houses/family to take care.
So our time as children with him are extremely limited.
As it is on weekdays he comes home late after work.
And we only get to see him only on alternate days.
So weekends are the only 2 days we’ll get to see him longer.
And if we r out on those day, dats it
Lesser time with papa.
Dats the answer ive had been getting since 7/8 years ago.

Always I feel sorry for friends who asks me out on weekends..
Coz ill never be able to make it. I can try but a slim 10% chance.

Curfew is also another thing.
Be home before maghrib which means not any later than 7.30pm.
Coz the moment the clock strikes 7.00pm
My hp just never stops ringing.

Saying on the way doesn’t actually help.
Coz when u say on the way,
They wanna know exactly where are u.
So paying parking ticket or getting in the car
Is not on the way. Its just getting to on the way.

I envy my friends who can go out as they please, and asking permission is a short conversation of informing ur going out.
I have friends who visits the mall like every other week or day. And been to almost all the mall in Klang Valley.
For me,
I think its been ages since ive last been to sogo, lot 10, O.u and u name it.
Believe it or not I think im the only Malaysian that have never stepped foot in The Curve.
And I could barely remember how midvalley looks like inside.

Actually my parents never liked us siblings going out. They don’t like the idea of “hanging out” especially going to malls. But sometimes I guess they have no choice but to let us go. But when we’r going we don’t only get a simple goodbye but a goodbye with an 1 hour lecture of safety, manners and bla..bla..bla dat we need to look after outside.

Its hard. Its just so hard.
Since they had provided us with so many necessities we have no choice but to obey them.
Coz the moment we disobey something. There is always a price to pay.
So what’s left to choose, obey or ur sorry.

I cant blame them for being like dat, having to witness and hear all sorts of stories that happens outside from home scares them or maybe turns them in to some kind of a paranoid.

I always question myself when will I get that ultimate freedom?
I guess I wont be having that.
Coz as long as im living with them, im living under their rules.
And the rules was created as a sign of care and love.
I don’t know.

I guess if my parents would to read this blog, they would ask them selves are they this strict? Or “omg! My daughter has this thought in her head all this while and us being strict and all has been an issue and conflict in her sad life.
I don’t know.
i just dont.

right now im..
having a bad week, expecting a sad semester, going thru a sad life.
i wonder y am i so stupid.. atleast othrs did get thru.
y cant i?

anyways.. aila coming back to K.L tmrw morning 7.45 bus..
i think ill only be able to meet her on monday..

syaf.. when will we meet again? all the best.!

as for the rest of my friends,
alia,jojo,eunice,erica and others congrats on ur results.
and all the best for the new semester..

aku tak tahu

2007-06-02T00:26:00.000+10:00

jika takdir menentukan akan ku pergi dlm tidurku,
apakah adapat ku pergi dalam senyuman.?

ku akui mmg menjadi dambaan insan-insan
utk selalu tersenyum
walau di hujung nyawa sekali pun

namun jika diri terus dijadikan tempat lontaran..
lontaran amarah dan geram di hati..

mampukah aku tersenyum?
tersenyum dalam kepahitan.

aku gusar,
aku runsing,

bilakah akhirnya mampu ku tersenyum?
senyuman yg sebenar-benar ikhlas..
keikhlasan tanpa kepahitan dan kesedihan..

aku tak tahu..

a silent cry..

2007-06-01T23:38:00.000+10:00

NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY...

I STILL CANT..

YAALLAH.. HELP ME..

PLEASE.. HELP ME. YAALLAH..

lazy to update

2007-01-26T01:36:00.000+11:00

hye..!!
i dont really feel like updating..
coz.. there are just nothing interesting that happends in my life..
however.. im gonna try..
for the past 2 months..
life has been a total mess..
cant really describe why..
but its just so in a mess..

owh yeah..
i now have a new pc
papa bought..
but i can never forget my stolen laptop..
everytime i see a laptop or pc..
ill always think about my lost pc..
not lost actually..
but was taken by the robbers who robbed my house
about 5 months ago..

but its ok..
im glad the robber took the laptop..
coz, according to my mum who was home during the robbery said that the robber would harm her if there is no valuble stuffs that he can take..

so take the laptop and leave my mum alone..!

ok that when by..

owh yes..
my birthday came..
my 21st bday.. on 19th of jan
everybody seems to be so excited..
but i donno why but i feel..
i donno wut i feel..
i dont feel as excited..
maybe thats it..

everyone did their best to throw me a party.,
i was happy to see them happy..

sitting back to think..
i dont know wut to think..
but there are too many things running in and out my head..
but what is running in and out my head..?
i donno..

something so hard to resolve, desolve and to solve..
wut am i saying..?
just trying to rhyme things..!

anyways..
i donno wut else to say..

thank you so very too much to everyone that was involve during my birthday to all the back bones in making the event a success.. i donno if i can thank u guys enough..
u know who u are..

and those who came..
it was great to see you all..
missed you all...

hurmmm did all the crap said above covered the 2 months on nothing fun in my life plot..?

i think so.

bosan...

2006-11-15T20:10:00.000+11:00

helloo..

donno why..
but i really feel like updating it today..
and im so sure its gonna be a super long one..
since my last entry was on the oct 20th..

which is almost 1mnth..hahaha
not lazy to type in..
but no pc.. or a lap top..
i miss my lap top..

haih..
ok..
exam is over..
it was ok..
not so bad..
not so either..
wut am i saying..?

never mind...
so wuts up lately..
met with an accident..
a bad one actually..
nasib baik tiada kemalangan jiwa di laporkan..
dan nasib baik papa tak naik angin..
kenapa dia nak naik angin pun kan..?
bukan my fault..
i didnt hit anyone..
it was that chinese guy who hit me..

so now..
im without my car..
so sedih..

sorry ye alia..
coz the accident involved u and ur mum..
other drivers shud be more carefull so they dont hit me kan..?

raya..raya..
no more in the raya mood..
but raya was not bad..
was quite fun..
i guess it wud be better without the exam..

now the raya story..
in the morning..
when to get lemang..
then at noon.
kavita,pathma,nanda, suren and rao came..
then had lunch..
after sejam lebih gitu.
jojo and alia plak sampai..
so we just lepak2..
makan2 tgk tv was pendekar bujang lapok kot..
bvoleh tahan gak... gelak2..
but then suren nak cepat..
kena blajar exam..
so kavita,pathma,suren and nanda left.
tinggal la rao, alia and jojo..
we all sambung tgk tv and alia..
enjoying kuih raya.. dont say u didnt..!?
hahaha.. jap tuh amik gmbr non stop..
and hantar raya mms to syaf..!
lawa kan? the background of alia running.
hahahaa...
then jojo had to go..
left rao and alia..
smpai malam we were watching hindi movie..
it was ok..
citer apa ek..? owh ya..! it was kabhi something..something

then malam gi raya kat umah aunty sue and umah ibu...
then that was it..
raya..
untill on the 3rd raya..
huzai and the gang came after isyak.
12 org semua..
then later that night kuar minum...
lepak2..

then then next day..
everything was as usual..
life.. the boring part of it..!

now..
im stuck at home..
doing nothing.. untill friday's interview..

i donno if i shud publish this or not..

publish je lah kan..?
da penat2 type..

ok la..

raya..? EXAM..!!

2006-10-20T16:08:00.000+10:00

hari raya coming soon..
i still rememeber how i used to write greeting crads to all my frends..
but that was all during primary and secondary school..
and i realize since im in uni people dont write raya card that much anymore..
my frens would sent raya sms,testimonials to replace the old writing tradition..
those days.. (as tho im so old) i used to get about 30-40 raya cards every year..
but now.. id get about 50 raya smses per year..
see what technology has done to us.. hahaha..

for me..
i think id still prefer writing raya cards..
but i have problem in going to the post office..
so id usually wait till i meet the people i wanna give the raya card to..
and give it by hand..
but always id run out of words over wut i wanna say in the card..
so my words will be about 3 or 4 lines now..
but before i used to write till the cards are so full i cud hardly sign in the end..

puasa has been fine with me..
and i think ive develope the "malas nak sahur" habit..
i donno why.. but actually i know why..
but i cant disclose it here.. P&C..

classes were still like usual..
study..study...study..
exams coming to get ME..!
its so stressful.. since im not the day type of a person..
id prefer studying late at night.. especially from midnite till 7 in the morn..
too many times my dad wud tell me.. why not sleep early.. wake up the next day fresh and study.. i tried.. but still i cant..but my way is almost the same..instead waking up early and study..id wake up late and stay up..same thing.. just i do it at night instead of doing it in the day..

raya preperation.. NOTHING.
wearing the last year's one..
no casual shopping..
havent played bunga api..
seriously.. this is not the raya im having in mind.

ok.. im tired..
and i just remmeber i have some raya cards to write..!

bye..!

its ok... but till when..?

2006-10-11T02:35:00.000+10:00

its true dat: there is nothing fair in this world..

but cant it atleast be almost fair..?

it seems that things are always fair for others..but things are never fair for me..
why do i take too much precautions so that i wont hurt people..?

its always been like that..i try so hard not to break a heart..

but instead im the one who gets dissapointed by people..if its broken by some guy.. an ex or something..

its diffrent..despite having 12 ex's..

i never once got my heart broken like how it is broken now..so frustrating..

perhaps.. "ull always hurt the one you love.."

dat maybe the right phrase..

but how come i try not hurting the one i love..

but im always hurt by the one i love and care for..?a confusing phrase i wud say..too much things.. running in my head now..

last friday during INT tutorials..Dr.Tang asked, "what wud u change or do if ur alive after 300 years?" or sumthing like dat..to his surprise..the answers he got was rather rubbish even some was quite good..

a guy wanted a tail..

2 gurls wanted to be psychic..and all other answers..

funny2 ones...

but when the floor was up to me..

i answerd..

after hearing my answer..he actually suggested me to go see the counselor..

why in the world wud he want me to do that..?

is it because of wut i said..?

my answer was.."if i was to be alive.. wut i would do or change is that..id rather be dead than to think or even do the changes.."

its silly i know..but that is what i want..hahahah.. silly..!silly..! silly!

i once ask someone...

why do poeple hurt us..?

and why do we just keep quiet about it and say its ok..

if its normal to be hurt by people..

why dont we return that "favour"and all she said was.."its ok feeza.."

why u dont return that favour is bcoz ur lucky..

ur lucky that u realize how u want to be treated in life..

so u treat people on how u want to be treated in return..
and its the strong love and care u have for people that keeps u going on saying.."

its ok..."

so. with that..i learned..the phrase "u hurt the one u love" is sumthing subjective..

aiyoooo..

when will all this be over..?

but there are things im looking foward to..
the buke puasa gath this friday..with everyone..
papa's return from penang.. on thursday..
hurmmm...

me and my plain ol' life..

TAK GUNA..!!!!

2006-10-05T23:18:00.000+10:00

SEMUA ORANG DALAM RUMAH NIE DAH GILA..!!!!!!!!!
PENTING KAN DIRI SENDIRI..!!!
SEMUA TAU NAK LETAK KESALAHAN ATAS KEPALA ORANG LAIN..!!!

KENAPA LA AKU LAHIR SEBAGAI AKU..!!???

KALAU MAUT ITU BOLEH MENDAMAIKAN..!!!!
KENAPA MANUSIA MASIH DISEKSA DI DUNIA..!!!!!

YALLAH..!!!!!!!!
SEDARKAN LA SEMUA ORANG..!!!!

ramadhan..syawal..

2006-10-05T05:21:00.000+10:00

hurmm...

ramadhan is finally here..
a month a way from syawal..
the best moment of the year..
duit raya visiting and all..

but as for the 3 years bck..
ive been having exams during raya..
raya is suppose to be a celebration
but instead it becomes a stressration..
is there even such word..?
gila merepek..

been sick..
due to my growing "wisdom tooth"
wise la sangat..!
makin merepek ada la..

over doing all assignments..
still got 1 more to go...

puasa has not been much of a fun this year..
sick grand ma, a busy dad, an on and off sick mothers..

dosent sound great huh..?

wud raya even be raya..?

too afraid to get the answer myself..

but ill be having another member to celebrate raya wif..
insyaallah..

happy ramadhan..

SO yesterday.. WHAT today..

2006-09-24T04:48:00.000+10:00

i cant sleep...
i also donno why..
i tried reading.. still i cant sleep..
to make it worst.. i dont understand wut im reading..

haiya..
anyways..
i also donno wut to type..
ermm..
last night was fun..
at chilies..
with pathma,kavita,kush,syaf,alia,sarah and leong..
1st time i met leong.. and the rest are familiar faces..
ate and talk till 10.45 then we headed to our own lil nest.
and it was the latest..
can u believe it..?
i dont think ill be coming home that late again...
alone..! especially..
hahahah

have u ever feel wut i feel..?
i guess u dont..
coz if u do..
ud understand..
but it seems like u dont..!

u dont treat people like how u dont wanna be treated..
ditching.. is never a good thing..
coz..
dont tell me u dont mind to be ditched..?

but for myself..
i dont mind at all to be ditched..
but i never ditched..
coz i believe.. dat..
sumthings are meant to be kept forever..

seriously i dont know wut im talking about..
im so tired and in stress...

i wanna be not me..
coz being me is not fun..

i dont even wanna be u..

hurmm..
i miss u..
hope to see u soon..

p/s: there is no 1 specific person for the "U's" that i used.

happy ramadhan.

2006-09-15T01:37:00.000+10:00

DAMN IT...!!!!!

boring state of life..

2006-09-13T19:19:00.000+10:00

life..
a journey with an unknown destination..

a quote i got from a guy who i bumped into on the way to the cafe today...
a simple quote..a deep meaning..
worn by a simple guy with a cute face.!
so.. wonder the bumming..!?
hahaha..

it was an accident..
that quote made me think about the journey of life..
the journey im in.. the journey ive been in.. and the journey ill be in..

coming back to think..
im not so sure myself if i had a pleseant one all this while..
trying to put my journey in sequence is not sumthing enjoying..
it reminds me of all the suffers..
reminds me of all the crap and rubbish..
reminds me all the people i met..
nice ones and not so nice ones.. and horrible ones..
no one is perfect.. but we can always try to be the best right..?

most of the time..
i regret for being so giving..
regret of being so calm..
regret of being used..
regret of being so forgiving..

but i just cant help it..
maybe its how god have designed me to be..
being so giving..
so calm..
allow myself to be used..
and being so forgiving..

being the person i am..
its not easy i wud say..
life is hard..
my dad wud say i sound lilke a 70 yrs old woman..
and i answerd him by..
go to campus and tell me..

actually its more than just campus..
it is basically everything..
every single thing that ive to tolerate with.. through out life..
life is too short to worry..
but it sure sounds as tho life is a long thing that needs worrying..

i always hold on to the phrase
sumthings are better be left unsaid.. undone..
and its for me to know and for u to find out..
but id rather u not..

coz no one can actually find out..
since im being the person i am..
i write my fears, worries, doubts and sadness out..
but its addressed to no one..
its useless but relieving in a way..

i feel that ive being so much of a person who loves analyzing..
coz i always ask sum people..
why do people do this to us..?
when we know its not nice to do it to ppl..
why are people in this situation to reacts this way..?
but why i dont react as such when im in dat situation..?
too many questions without any answer..

many things happend..
too fast that freaks me out..
changes takin place..
a new way of life..

no more good ol' routine..
uve got to be on ur feet..
and sacrifice all uve got..

wait a minute..
i donno why im so blur..
why can people do it to us..
but we cant do it to them..?

sounds a lil unfair isnt it..?

everything.. kept inside..
wuts taken out is just a big huge..

SIGH....!

a rouGh onE..

2006-08-27T19:50:00.000+10:00

hello..
hahahaha..
assigns done..!

but not for long..

tot of up dating my blog..
but the thing is..
its just not comfortable typing on this laptop..
i miss my own lap top..

this month has been quite a bad one..

the only thing i can say is..

....some things are better be left unsaid and undone....

sTrEsS...pOoL..1901... HaPieY..!

2006-08-10T01:21:00.000+10:00

today.. a very confusing day id suppose.. i also donno why..
maybe.. because i have many things running in my head kot..
but tkpe la... after the hassle made by monash..
me and syaf we played to games of pool even i lost both of the game..
but still it was a good game.. kan syaf..?
why we played was to kill the time while waiting for alia and jojo..
and the most important thing is to release stress..

soon after dat alia and jojo came..
wanted to play ping-pong but was not available..
since we were hungry.. we went and buy 1901 hotdog..

after makan..
we made our way to indah villa carpark..
and thats it..!
bye bye..!

jumpa esok..!

pic above: the pOol table.. then me and alia, me and syaf then 1901..!!!

wUt a dAy..!

2006-08-09T15:45:00.000+10:00

haiyoh..

everytime..

ill get the plz update warning from syaf..

alia also.. she goes verbal..

while syaf will text it.

anyways..

here it goes.. urmm.. where shud i start since its been a very very long time since i wrote in.. now.. im in a very busy mode.. assigns and everything..

but at home for now.. its so fun..

i have my 2 little adik angkat [daniel 11 and nuqman 9] staying with me for about a week..

the only problem is they r so annoying.. yet adorable..

top pic: ...nuqman and me...

top pic: ...daniel and me...

other than that....

classes are as usual with the most yuckiest timetable..! i hate the timings.. its as tho my day ends so soon.. yesterday as usual the lunch date with the usual wacko peeps.. after class. went to see ameiyrul.. bought him his usual fav filet o' fish played with him.. got him annoyed.. made him scream and tease him alot.. as usual.. after that i went back home.. force daniel to wake up from his nap and ask him why didnt he take his lunch.. his answer was as usual "kenyang lagi la kak.."

then i made way to my room for my own nap.. hehehe.. was so tired la.. at night.. watched a movie in disney channel.. mcm budak kecik je.. then makan dinner.. sweetsour fish dgn soup[e] sayur.. then baca buku sikit.. main carom sikit..

then went to the shop with alia, nuqman,daniel and shikin for an ice cream.. the best part was.. we played a spelling game on the way to the shop.. the game is called the spelling BEE. we were happily spelling till we ran out of words.. that made alia to choose the word "kentut" while nuqman.. as tho he is one smart fellow.. chose a difficult word to spell.. but end up making error while spelling it.. since when the spelling for the word amphibian is ampbian? and just for that. me and daniel.. started laughing damn loud. in the middle of the road.. just like ghosts relesed from thier grave.!

on the way back from the shop.. we walked pass a neighbour's house.. it was then i noticed that.... OWH MY GOD..! i saw the burnings for the hungry ghost festival..

DAmn!

i then instantly got the uneasy feelings in me.. coz it was near that house where we were laughing damn loud when we were walking to the shop eralier.. just to make myself feel alil bit calm.. i said that.. hurmm perhaps the ghost were busy eating that they didnt hear us laughing..? but still.. i was worried of nuqman,daniel since they were still small.. and alia and shikin coz they might be weak inside..

so i had to read some verse from the Quran as protection for them and myself.. once we got home...

i felt better..

nomore uneasy feeling..

we started jumping and making jokes like monkeys again.. befor going to bed.. me, alia,nuqman and daniel was in my mum's room.. we were playing on the bed.. then we wraped nuqman in the big blanket and ran out of the room,., it took nuqman quite sumtime to realize that we left him in my mums room. we ran to the kitchen and hide..

we actually hid in the maids room that was in the kitchen.. but my crazy bibik.. she knows we were hiding.. and when nuqman came to the kitchen to look for us.. and nuqman just look around and left.. to search for us upstairs.. then my crazy bibik said.." apa bodoh nuqman ini.. kenapa tak tanya bibik?" is she crazy or wut..!! she knows we were hiding and.. DUH..! we dont want her to let nuqman know.. but still she cud say that..!

but nvm, when we knew nuqman was upstairs we came out quitely from our hiding place and sat at the living room.. as for a puninshment for nuqman.. we told him to walk like a monkey.. and he did it quite well.. and we called him the somalia monkey since he is very2 skinny..!

top pic: this is a wacko pic of me and alia..

the night then just ended.. since we were tired..

good night..!

...hate being me..

2006-07-22T01:42:00.000+10:00

many days..
i sit and cry..
blaming my fate..
blaming me for being who i am..
i wanna be somebody else..
but who could bare being in my shoes..?

many days..
i scream..!!
i shout..!!
when will all this end..?

where are the love i use to feel..!
the care!?
the warmth of comfort..!

all gone..!!
never to be seen or heard
or even worst
never to be felt..!

im loosing what i loved the most.!
but still im being able to smile..
pretend that things are alright..!

but who knows!!!
WHO KNOWS..!!!
the tears..!!!!
the fear..!!
but me..!!

I HATE BEING ME..!!!!!

..tO mY dEaR fRiEnD..

2006-07-05T21:37:00.000+10:00

As I sit here in alone,
I think of my friend
And think about the time
coming to an end.

It's gonna be sad
To say good- bye.
I'll miss you.
I know I’ll cry.

I’ll wait for the day
When u came back
To be with you again
And get on track.

We had so many moments;
Some bad, most great.
I'll always remember the love
And erase the hate.

I don't wanna say good- bye to you
I don't want all the time we had
To come to an end.

written by: FeEzA [ 15 may 2005]

wHy..?

2006-07-05T21:30:00.000+10:00

Why am I always blamed over things I don’t do..?
Who is there I have to back me up..
Cheer me up..?
Take my fears and worries?

Who..?

No one..
No one that is there who can bear my journey
But myself..

I tried.. I cried.. I failed..
I tried to face my journey..
I cried the obstacles that came by..
I failed to prove me strong…

As bitter as things cud be..
As sour as things cud be..
Not even a pinch of sweetness there was..

Why am I born as I am..?
I tried all I can..
To please everyone..
To love everyone unconditionally..
To care and cherish..
Every heart every soul..
that are connected to me..

Sometimes..
I think I fall short to understand..
The cries and the fails..
That will actually make me to not be a quitter..
That will make me try everything..

And actually prove to no one I am strong..
But actually..
To prove to myself that I am strong..!

Written by: FeEzA [ 12 june 2006]

sorry.. i cant be perfect..

2006-06-01T00:35:00.000+10:00

wow..! 12 0f may..
dats the last i posted??

not bad..
im getting lazier and lazier..
wut to do..
no choice to many assignments need to be done..
but still..
there are some happy moments..
dats never to be missd..

i have 1 more week
prior to my next exam.
JRN..
Dear datin..,
please dont fail me..
i promise ill be good.. [yeah right..!]

i need to pass..
is it to much to ask?
its not asking for a high distinction or anything..
but just a pass..! JUST A PASS..!!
is it to much to ask for..?
i need to take the worries out of my dad..
plzz..plz..plzz..
yaALLAH..
plz pass me..
plzzz..plz..plz..

i promise ill be good to all the creatures
around me..

shheeessshh...!!

how crappy could dat be..?
me being good..?
i dont think so..?
but its worth a try..
maybe next sem..!
perhaps..
ill be someone new..

lately..
hurmm..
i cant even remember what happend to me lately,,
owh ya..!
fell from the stairs..
papa left to goa..!
sob..! sob..!
come back soon pa..
u need to assist me for my exam..!!

but sadly..
papa will only be back
on the 7th of june. which is a week from now..!
dats when my next paper starts..!!
too late..!!!!

NOOOO...!!!!

i hope ill be able to face it..

why is it so hard to bring out
wuts in me..?
wuts bothering me..?
how i wish someone can read me..
tell the "?" dat i have..
without me telling..?
perhaps..
its only me who has
dat "talent" read people..

so i suppose i have to read
my ownself?
why the hell should i read..!!!
i already know wuts going on..!

FINE...!!

just ignore it..!

i dont know is it just me..
but little..little thing
just starts to bother me now..
im adapting..!!!
give me a break..!

but its ok..
papa is coming home soon..
and talk to me..!
things will be cool by then..

i HOPE..!

owh ya..!
ive got some remarks from some peeps dat i know..
they say that im a nice.
person..!
hahaha.. i know i am..
thank u.. thank u..!
bu still nice people like me are hurt..
waaa....waaaa..waaaaa..
why hurt me when i dont hurt you.?
want me to hurt u izzit..?
dont regret aaa... [its a warning..]

but then..
i dont hurt those i love..
so..

dear, all people dat i love..
dont hurt me too....
coz illl never do anything to hurt you all..
so please.. dont hurt me..
ive got nothing in this world..
but the all of you..

but then..

even if u hurt me..
its ok..
i dont care..!

IM SO USED TO IT..!!
get the hint..?
so..
stop ok..?

haih..
wut the hell is this?
it sounds more like a letter to myself..
or perhaps..
a letter or pray to ALLAH.
a letter to datin..
a letter to my papa...
and a letter to my love ones..

ok..
i think i better stop here..
bye bye..

lastly..
here is wut ive got to say..

if u gonna have trouble reading it..
here is wat it says..
[i was going to kill the smartest person on earth,
untill i realize.. suicide is a crime..]

alamak!

2006-05-02T18:26:00.000+10:00

hello...

hahaha.. i know its been sumtime
since i last wrote in..
thanks for the reminder syaf..

ill try to be as regular as u r..!
maybe ill start taking pictures of all
the place i go and things i do..
pictures of my food clothes or anything..!
ill make u as my bloggie role model..
can..?

the thing is..
things i do are always crappy..!
its gonna be like merepek
to put it on..

but nvm la..
ill just hentam la..

anyways..
i wanna log of now..
hahaha..
surely ill post again tonite..!

maybe!

i NEED help..!!

2006-03-17T17:23:00.000+11:00

dear readers..
of all gender,colour and ages..

i NEED ur help..!

if at all by any chance u wud know..

thank you..!

hahahahahah..! =p

2006-03-17T17:03:00.000+11:00

hello,,
im currently in the comp lab..
printing out my research paper..
to read.. analyze..
then BURN! with cheese..
then make kavita to eat it..
since she loves cheese so much..
hahahah!! sorry kavita ka..!
BUT THEN.... can share tak..?
i love cheese too...!

alia went to buy barang with her mum..
new socks i guess..! hahaha..

and im left with 1 more hour before
my next class starts..

then im off to see ameiyrul..!
with his filet o' fish of course..!

beside me is zanna..

doing research on managment..
i just done xplaining to her..
how to tackle the question..
and go cramp the lecturer with questions..
sort of like getting a hint..
even i know it wont really work..
but its worth of trying..!
right rujaque'..!?

dont stress ok..
u make me stress also laa...!
=(
i know ull do good in it..!

hmmm..
tomorrow got class..!
=( hate it..!
but no choice..

stand on ur own feet feeza..!
work on it..!
dont frown..!
hahahah...!

after dat class..
im already un available to nobody..!
coz im taken..!
muahaha..!
evil laugh..!

im taken by mr.assignment due so near..!

see..see im crapping..!
see alia wut u did..!

at least if ur here...!
ill got sumthing else to do
rather than crapping and slamming the keyboard..!
bugging u perhaps..!
or maybe go for minum in cafe..
while i swim in the
pool of words from the reaserch paper..!
so dramatic..!
IM GONNA DROWN!!
BLUB..! BLUB...! BLUB..!
-DEAD-

P/S: NOT DEAD..!
but back to STUDYING..!

something like that!

2006-03-09T01:06:00.000+11:00

something like that!
sYaf's bLog..

hOwS d aCt..?

2006-02-16T02:29:00.000+11:00

hey everyone..!!

lets try change our mood!
i hate being sad and frustrated..
even dats wut is happening now..

so lets cheer ourselves up..
since its up to us to make our self happy..!

remember people..
no one can make u be happier..
than u urself..!

wake up in the morning..!
get fresh!

dont forget to brush ur teeth!

have a nice day!

try push the frown upwards..

there u go!

a smile!

from

why....? ='(

2006-02-16T02:24:00.000+11:00

why cant things just be a little bit better...?
why cant i just leave my life as usual..
why wont all those people..
who make my life miserable
just leave me..
let me live my life!
why must i suffer over ur mistakes!?

somebody...! anybody!
tell me...!!

too LATE but NVM..!

2006-02-15T03:02:00.000+11:00

happy valentines day!!
but its already past 12..
so its already 15 feb
but nvm..

my day to today.. was rubbish..

towards the evening was kinda ok..

after work.. went to the up hill area..
to ease my mind..
then when to meeT my lil valentine!
valentine are not only for lovers..
its practically celebrated with everyone!
family ,frens and god knows who..
[the list goes on]
* dont really celebrate tho.. just for the sake of its "the day u spread love to d world!"*
lame .. i know!

this year.. i didnt accept any invitation..
coz i have some things bugging my mind..
so turned it all down..
instead..
i went and visit my lil 5 yr old bro..
and spent the whole evening with him..
we went to the park..
went driving..
went walking..
share one packet of keropok lekor..
one cup of tea..
one sofa..
one colouring book..
and the tv set..
was just perfect!
qulity time..
kak long and lil ameiyrul..

then in the evening too..
a call ive been waiting for..
finally came..
had a fun chat!
and at that moment
i felt dat the day is complete!
had dineer with my family..
and spoke to my dad..!!

now.. chatting with my fren..
the one dats far..
but near in heart and mind..
and happily chatting and laughing away...

still...
no one knows...

...silence....

p/s: dats me and ameiyrul..!

tHe MiDnIgHt TeArs

2006-02-14T02:18:00.000+11:00

when midnite hits the 12th bell..

tears of sorrow..
tears of frustration..
tears of anger..
tears of giving up...

rolls down..
without an end..

shatters the faith..
tears the hope..
ruins the will...
takes away everything..

loosing it..
is just as loosing the moon at sunrise..

but not able to hang on to it at sunset..
it come and go..
without fail..
without doubts..

still it cant be seize..
by naked hands..

where is it..?
the will..?
the faith..?
the hope..?

a question without an answer..

wUt a DaY...!

2006-02-14T01:01:00.000+11:00

today..
i gained sumthing and i loose sumthing..
gained sumthing i dont want..
loose sumthing so dear..

hard rock patience needed..
but not even a pinch of it in me..
where r u!?
the one on earth i always lean to..
never im gonna go on the search anymore..

come back..
nothing more id ask..

2005-06-25T16:39:00.000+10:00

im so bored..
miss my friend so much..
im so confused at the same time..
stuck..stuck..stuck..
stuck between..
dreams and responsibilities..
which one to choose..

:::...cHaNgEs...:::

2005-02-21T19:44:00.000+11:00

what is it so different?
why shud there b a difference?
why cant it just be the same?

its a fact to know...
that changes happens everytime..
as time goes by many changes goes by too..
it dosent matter if we like it or not..

I know that there are some changes..
are changes that we can avoid..
but its all too late for me...
ive lost everyhing..

everything changed..
changes that i hate so much..
changes that i could never..
even abit adapt to...

bY: NoRhAfItZaH aShRufF =(

2005-02-12T02:06:00.000+11:00

YOU!!
why is my life so up thight..?
what the hell i did that i have to deserve all this?
why is life so hard?
what the hell i should do?
why cant i just enjoy happy life
just like everyone else..
why must i loose all the best things i have in life?

all the crap im facing is killing me inside!!
i hate all those liars i meet in my life!!
why do they exist?
what have i done..!!
WHAT!!!
when is all this gonna end?
who is gonna end all this?
who is there i can trust..
when all the ppl i trust are backstabbers!
what's the use of living..
when all there is are misrable things,
misrable ppl and misrable situation..
i need YOU!!
who is you?
god knows..
and only i know..

By: Norhafitzah Ashruff

2005-01-26T20:27:00.000+11:00

Me MySeLf & I

2005-01-25T01:15:00.000+11:00

When the night seems to be so bored..
when two friends meet online and have
nothing to do or to talk about...
when to brains become one..
as the bordem monopolize our brain..
this was what happend..
when we lost our mind!!

ThE UnIvErSE...

i lost my mind!
i lost mind too
why don’t we not search for it
and we live happily in fantasy
happily ever after
together with our still standing brick wall
at the back
may the stars shine our night
may the moon brightened the wall
as the sun pulls the blanky and wave good night
and the sky be our judge
in wat ever decision we had made
and the asteroids as the jury
meteors will be our defender
let the milky way be the prison of love
and the shooting starts as the prosecutors
let our love not be shaken and shattered for now and eternity.

By: PsYcHo_FeEzA & AmYrAz..

WuT a DaY!!

2005-01-24T04:34:00.000+11:00

The subang parade trip..
fuuh.. so tiring..
i was searching for a book about
NOSTRADAMUS..
had to call tanya for that..
thanks tanya!!
then my sis went around looking for
ref books for her SPM while..
me and papa just look around the book store for
any good books to comment on..
and just crap on..
hahaha it was fun!!

came home..
papa had dinner..
i sms alia..
but i didnt bug her this time..
its my 24th day of the new year resolution..
stop bugging ppl!!
NOT!!

after that went in my room..
came online..
did reseach on bTx..
the subject that have been driving me up the wall..

hurmm aniways..
i really hope i can buy that book
about NOSTRADAMUS by Halley sumthing..
i have to go back to subang parade MPH soon!!

aiyooo im getting so sleepy waiting for alia to come online..
where in the world is she...
still in the mosque i guess..
a very good god's creation..

owh ya..
today is my fren's bday..
wished her already...
hope she will have a wonderful bday this year..

owh man!
before i forgot..
ive been trying to forget about this fella
but he keeps on bugging my life..
i just donno wut to do to make him to hate me..
hahaha.. i guess its just my luck.. ( a bad one)
each time i erase him from my memory..
he will always be auto saved..
like a word document in my pc.
HELP ME!!

ok better forget about him now..
STAY FOCUS!!
hahahah
i think i got to run now..
my bed is calling me..

..11 LeSsOnS oF LiFe..

2005-01-23T20:18:00.000+11:00

1. It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel.

2. A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go.

3. The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.

4. It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

5. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone... BUT it takes a lifetime to forget someone.

6. Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright.

7. Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.

8. Always put yourself in the other's shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the person too.

9. A careless word may kindle strife; a cruel word may wreck a life; a timely word may level stress; a loving word may heal and bless.

10. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

11. Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, ends with a tear. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life to the fullest so that when you die, you're the one smiling and everyone around you is crying.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

...January 23rd 2005...

2005-01-23T17:34:00.000+11:00

heylo..
it has been an awful boring day today..
had nothing to do..
the assignment for btx is driving me up the wall..
hurmm
maybe ill be going out with papa later..
goin to MPH to read books..
hahaha... hope it will be fun..
everybody and everything seems fine..

owh ya..
yesterday went for breakfast
with my siblings..
baby ameiyrul had a blast at the table..
he get to eat what he wants and drink what he want..
coz there were no parents around!!
happy for him..
all the cold drinks he consumed..
all the mess he made at the table..
its all nature..hahaha

hurmm
i have to call zanna shortly got some stuffs to discuss..
what have i been doing today??
*had breakfast
*played computer
*went online
* bug alia as usual.
* wondering..
* got myself confuse
*feeling sorry for sum ppl..
*talk crap and rubbish
thats about it..

hurmmm
ok lah ill stop here first
see la maybe ill continue again later
or tomorrow..
see ya bloggie..
-muarx-

My LiFe!!

2005-01-23T16:55:00.000+11:00

I always feel like breaking down

Always feel out of place

Like somehow I just don't belong

And no one understands me

Always wanna runaway

Always lock myself in my room

With the radio on turned up so loud

That no one hears me screamin

I know what it's like

When nothing feels all right

I know what it's like

To be like me

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when Im down

To feel like I've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save me

No I know what it's like

Welcome to my life

I wanna be somebody else

Im sick of feeling so left out

Im desperate to find something more

Before my life is over

Im stuck inside a world I hate

Im you sick of everyone around

With their big fake smiles and stupid lies

While deep inside Im bleeding

I know what it's like

When nothing feels all right

I know what it's like

To be like me

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when Im down

To feel like I've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save me

I know what it's like

Welcome to my life

Every one lied straight to my face

Every one stabbed me in the back

I might think

I'm happy but

I'm not gonna be okay

Everybody always gave you what you wanted

Never had to work it was always there

I know what it's like

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when Im down

To feel like I've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save me

No I know what it's like (what it's like)

To be hurt

To feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when Im down

To feel like I've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one's there to save me

No I know what it's like

Welcome to my life!

2005-01-23T00:58:00.000+11:00

LIFE!!
(How Harder Could It Get..)

If life was meant to be hard..
how hard would it get..
if life is gonna end..
how soon is it gonna be??
if every confusion is is a knot
is the knot tied dead or loose..

How can there be a smiling face
when all smiling face were taken away.
what's the use of screaming for help
when it is sure that there are no help around
should fate be blamed or praised.
life has its up and down..
happiness and sadness takes thier place
after one to another..
patience is all thats needed..
its just in a matter of having it or not..
holding on to it or letting it go..

(By:NoRhAfItZaH AsHrUfF )

SELAMAT HARI RAYA!!

2005-01-21T17:53:00.000+11:00

heylo again bloggie..
happy raya aniways..
just got back from the mosque..
damn tired la..
i donno what im gonna do after this..
maybe sleep..

yesterday was fun..
zana,baby,bel and bel's sis
came over to lepak and have dinner..
after that we played "bunga api"
untill i go a bad cough coz of the smoke..
then i had hiccups..
its been quite sumtime since i last had hiccups..
after we went to clatex.. bought choc..
then we just lepak2 and talk to alia through the voice chat in msn..
and as usual alia got the bugging of her life.. hahaha!! =p

hurmmm
what else..
owh ya maybe got to go to klang..
donno when ill be back..
then i have to start thinking bought mr.ameer assignment
really have no idea what to do about it..

ok la.. i think ill stop now..
donno what to crap adi..
bye..!! see ya!

bloggie!!

2005-01-20T04:10:00.001+11:00

hurmm i guess this is my 1st time writing in..
and i seriously donno what to write..
hurmmm lemme tell what happened today..
today 19th of january..
my 19th bday.. and a simple one..
the most simple one i ever had..
2 big for parties and all..
hahhahhaa..

people keep on asking me what i want for my bday..
but i said nothing..
infact there is something i really want but its so damn
impossible to get.. hahahaha!!
niways.. just got back from dinner with the whole family..
had lunch with zanna,baby and bel..
thats about it.. the bday stuffs..

in college today everything was like usual..
just some stupid things happened..
im so damn tired..
currently now.. im doing nothing